(1). You think you're not pretty? Someone is wishing to be as pretty as you. (2). You want more money?? World 30% People are in poverty. (3). You want a boyfriend girlfriend? Someone doesn't even have parents. (4). You're hungry? A child is starving. (5). You want to go to the mall? Someone is lookingvfor anything to wear just to stay warm. (6). You're chilly? Others are frozen. (7). You just want to die? Most people are striving to live. ** So don't waste your time on things that you think you don't have, because there is always someone out there who needs what you have .. If u feel grateful then 'thank God'

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Reaction Vs Response : Story of a Cockroach Suddenly, a cockroach flew from somewhere and sat on her. I wondered if this was the cockroach’s response to all the glory that was spoken about it! She started screaming out of fear. With panic stricken face and trembling voice, she started doing jumping, with both her hands desperately trying to get rid of the cockroach. Her reaction was contagious, as everyone in her group got cranky to what was happening. The lady finally managed to push the cockroach to another lady in the group. Now, it was the turn of the other lady in the group to continue the drama. The waiter rushed forward to their rescue. In the relay of throwing, the cockroach next fell upon the waiter. The waiter stood firm, composed himself and observed the behavior of the cockroach on his shirt. When he was confident enough, he grabbed and threw it out with his fingers. Sipping my coffee and watching the amusement, the antenna of my mind picked up a few thoughts and started wondering, was the cockroach responsible for their histrionic behavior? If so, then why was the waiter not disturbed? He handled it near to perfection, without any chaos. It is not the cockroach, but the inability of the ladies to handle the disturbance caused by the cockroach that disturbed the ladies. I realized even in my case then , it is not the shouting of my father or my boss that disturbs me, but its my inability to handle the disturbances caused by their shouting that disturbs me. It’s not the traffic jams on the road that disturbs me, but my inability to handle the disturbance caused by the traffic jam that disturbs me. More than the problem, it’s my reaction to the problem that hurts me. Lesson: Do not react in life, instead, respond. The women reacted, whereas the waiter responded. The quality of a response is always superior to the quality of a reaction. Reactions are always instinctive whereas responses are always intellectual.

Career: As an employee, you are essentially a small business of one.Your employer is the customer. You must focus on increasing your skills to be more desirable

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Build a Bridge, not a Fence Once upon a time two brothers who lived on adjoining farms fell into conflict. It was the first serious rift in 40 years of farming side by side, sharing machinery, and trading labor and goods as needed without a hitch. Then the long collaboration fell apart. It began with a small misunderstanding and it grew into a major difference, and finally it exploded into an exchange of bitter words followed by weeks of silence. One morning there was a knock on John’s door. He opened it to find a man with a carpenter’s toolbox. “I’m looking for a few days work,” he said. “Perhaps you would have a few small jobs here and there. Could I help you?” “Yes,” said the older brother. “I do have a job for you. Look across the creek at that farm. That’s my neighbor, in fact, it’s my younger brother. Last week there was a meadow between us and he took his bulldozer to the river levee and now there is a creek between us. Well, he may have done this to spite me, but I’ll go him one better. See that pile of lumber curing by the barn? I want you to build me a fence – an 8-foot fence – so I won’t need to see his place anymore. Cool him down, anyhow.” The carpenter said, “I think I understand the situation. Show me the nails and the post-hole digger and I’ll be able to do a job that pleases you.” The older brother had to go to town for supplies, so he helped the carpenter get the materials ready and then he was off for the day. The carpenter worked hard all that day measuring, sawing, nailing. About sunset when the farmer returned, the carpenter had just finished his job. The farmer’s eyes opened wide, his jaw dropped. There was no fence there at all. It was a bridge… a bridge stretching from one side of the creek to the other! A fine piece of work handrails and all – and the neighbor, his younger brother, was coming across, his hand outstretched. “You are quite a fellow to build this bridge after all I’ve said and done.” The two brothers stood at each end of the bridge, and then they met in the middle, taking each other’s hand. They turned to see the carpenter hoist his toolbox on his shoulder. “No, wait! Stay a few days. I’ve a lot of other projects for you,” said the older brother. “I’d love to stay on,” the carpenter said, “but, I have many more bridges to build.” What are you going to build today, a fence or a bridge?

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The Value of $ 20 A well known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20 bill. In the room of 200, he asked, “Who would like this $20 bill?” Hands started going up. He said, “I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this.” He proceeded to crumple the dollar bill up. He then asked, “Who still wants it?”Still the hands were up in the air. “Well,” he replied, “What if I do this?” And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now all crumpled and dirty. “Now who still wants it?” Still the hands went into the air. “My friends, you have all learned a very valuable lesson. No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20. Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We feel as though we are worthless. But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value. Lesson: You are special – Don’t ever forget it!

Career: Your main goal at work should be to learn and contribute. Success and promotion will follow from there.

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9 Steps to Better Communication in Relationships Relationships don’t exist in a vacuum. They exist between two emotional human beings who bring their own past experiences, history, and expectations into it. Two different people also have different levels of skill when it comes to communication. But better communication, because it is a skill, can also be learned. 1. Stop and listen. When we’re knee deep within a serious discussion or argument with our significant other, it’s hard to put aside our point for the moment and just listen. We’re often so afraid of not being heard, we rush to keep talking. Ironically, such behavior makes it all the more likely we won’t be heard. 2. Force yourself to hear. Rephrasing what a person has just said to them (called “reflection”).This may upset a partner if you do it too much, or do it in a tone that suggests you’re mocking rather than trying to seriously listen. So use the technique sparingly, and let your partner know why you’re doing it if they ask — “Sometimes I don’t think I’m getting what you’re telling me, and doing this lets me slow my mind down a bit and really try and hear what you’re saying.” 3. Be open and honest with your partner. Little lies turn into big lies. Hiding your emotions behind a cloak of invincibility might work for you, but won’t work for most others. Pretending everything is alright isn’t alright. And giving your partner the silent treatment is about as useful as a fish with a bicycle. In the desert. At night. These things may have “worked” for you in the past, but they are all barriers to good communication. Being open means talking about things you may have never talked about with another human being before in your life. It means being vulnerable and honest with your partner, completely and unabashedly. It means opening yourself up to possible hurt and disappointment. But it also means opening yourself up to the full potential of all a relationship can be. 4. Pay attention to nonverbal signals. Most of our communication with one another in any friendship or relationship isn’t what we say, but how we say it. Nonverbal communication is your body language, the tone of your voice, its inflection, eye contact, and how far away you are when you talk to someone else. Learning to communicate better means that you need to learn how to read these signals as well as hear what the other person is saying. Reading your partner’s nonverbal signals takes time and patience, but the more you do it, the more attuned you will be to what they’re really saying. All the while you’re reading your partner’s nonverbal signals, be aware of your own. Make and maintain eye contact, keep a neutral body stance and tone to your voice, and sit next to the person when you’re talking to them. 5. Stay focused in the here and now. Sometimes discussions turn into arguments, that can then morph into a discussion about everything. To be respectful of one another and the relationship, you should try and keep the discussion (or argument) focused to the topic at hand. While it’s easy to get in the cheap shots or bring up everything that an argument seems to call for, just don’t. If the argument is ostensibly about who’s making dinner tonight, keep it that topic. Don’t veer off down the country road of who does what in the house. Arguments that do veer off tend to escalate and grow larger and larger. 6. Try to minimize emotion when talking about important, big decisions. Nobody can talk about important, big matters if they feel emotionally vulnerable or charged-up and angry. Those are not the times to talk about the serious issues (like money, getting married, the kids, or retirement). You might think it impossible, nonsensical or even contradictory to talk about an emotional topic like getting married or having children without emotion. And yet, these discussions need to keep a foothold of rationality to them in order to not gloss over the realities that they bring. Marriage, for instance, brings the combining of households and living with another person day-to-day. Having kids isn’t just about cute toddler clothes and painting the nursery, but talking about who’s going to change diapers, feed the newborn, and be available at all hours of the day and night for months on end. 7. Be ready to cede an argument. How many times do we continue to argue or have a heated discussion because we simply want to be “right.” I’ve talked about this sense of needing to “win” arguments more than once. Why? Because so many of couples’ arguments revolve around one party thinking they’re “right” and the other party not willing to cede the point or back off. In fact, though, both parties need to back off. By doing this, are you giving up a piece of yourself by compromising and not insisting on how right you are? Well, that’s something only you can decide. Would you rather be in a happy relationship where you respect the other person, even if you may occasionally disagree with them? Or would you rather be in an unhappy relationship where you know you’re always right, no matter what? It just comes down to your priorities — if being “right” is more important to you than your partner’s happiness, then have not found the right partner. 8. Humor and playfulness usually help. You don’t have to be funny in order to use humor and playfulness in everyday conversations. You just need to use the sense of humor you do have and try and inject it into more of your communications with your partner. Humor helps lighten everyday frustrations and helps puts things into perspective more gently than other methods. Playfulness reminds us that even as adults, we all have a side to us that enjoys fun and taking a break from the seriousness of work and other demands made on us. 9. Communicating is more than just talking. To communicate better and more effectively in your relationship, you don’t only have to talk. You can communicate in other ways — through your actions, and nowadays, electronically too (through email, Facebook, blogs, texting or Twitter). All too often, couples focus only on the talking aspect of their relationship, but your actions also speak loudly. Keeping in touch throughout the day or week through email or other electronic means also reminds the person you’re thinking about them and how important they are in your life. Even if such communications are mainly playful or inconsequential, they can help lighten your partner’s day and improve their mood. Nobody is a perfect communicator all the time. But you can work to become a better communicator by trying a few of these tips. They won’t all work, nor will they work all the time. Better communication, however, starts with one person making the effort to improve, which often encourages the other to come along for the ride.

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8 Elements of Compatibility for Healthy Relationships If you’re looking to measure the health and potential of your relationship, look at these eight factors for compatibility. Every relationship is wholly unique, but there are some common elements that good, healthy, long-lasting relationships share. If you’re wondering whether you and your partner have the compatibility to make your relationship last, take a look at these eight elements of healthy relationship compatibility: 1. Conversation. Is it you or your partner who does most of the talking in your relationship? While some relationships naturally favor one person speaking over the other, there should be some level of balance between the two of you initiating and maintaining conversations. 2. Intimacy. Sexual intimacy is important for a healthy relationship — but not in the same way for every couple. What’s important is that you both have the same level of satisfaction with your sex life — whether that means being intimate daily or hardly ever. 3. Relaxation. What one person finds relaxing, the other should at least find tolerable. That is to say, one person can’t feel restless at home but comfortable at a busy bar while the other person feels the total opposite. 4. Ambition. You don’t have to share the same ambitions, but there should be some level of mutual goal planning. Are you, as a couple, more focused on building a stable career, or more focused on enjoying life as it comes to you? 5. Philosophy. You don’t have to share the same political or religious affiliations, but you should share what’s truly important in life. 6. Interests. Interests won’t make or break your relationship, but sharing interests and hobbies is a great indicator of a potentially long-lasting relationship. 7. Respect. Respect should be an immediate given. Even if you have arguments from time to time, the true measure of how compatible you are as partners is how much respect you hold for each other, even in times of frustration. 8. Passion. That goofy lovestruck feeling might not last forever, but you should always feel passionate about your relationship in a way that makes you feel proud and attached to your relationship. If you experience all eight of these compatibility factors, odds are you’re in a relationship with potential to last for many years.

Career: Business meals are about business, not the food. Learn and use simple table manners. Good table manners make you look polished and poised.

Career: Talk openly about your failures. People will respect and trust you if they see that you're taking risks and aren't ashamed to learn from them.

Quotes that will change your life. If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present. – Lao Tzu Life is not always a matter of holding good cards, but sometimes, playing a poor hand well. - Jack London. I always wonder why birds choose to stay in the same place when they can fly anywhere on the earth, then I ask myself the same question. –Harun Yahya. Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. -Albert Einstein. Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. – Mark Twain. We don’t see things the way they are. We see them the way WE are. -Talmud Life isn’t a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, latte in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming ‘Woohoo WHAT A RIDE’! You cannot be lonely if you like the person you’re alone with – Dr. Wayne Dyer When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us – Alexander Graham Bell.