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Have you found yourself wrung out, tense tired and you haven't even got out the door to work yet? The stresses and strains, the toils and trials of life just keep coming and some days its hard to know whats what. “ It seems the faster I run the more I stand still” a weary client said to me recently “its as if I am on a treadmill that wont switch off, and now its in my mind as well. Thoughts ,plans ,organising and that is only for dinner for the family, a dinner that can hardly taste anymore. “ By the time you handle the long delays in traffic, the ringing phone as emails and calls about work keep your nervous system alert and ready of action, you are flooded with stress hormones.And your mind is like a buzzing fly incessantly going over and over things never giving you a reprieve. Is it always a rush to get to the next thing Does this ring a bell? Have your lost the taste of satisfaction in your day to day life and haven't the energy or interest in going out at the weekend. And yet the people around you in work, out and about seem so efficient, professional and have it all worked out Or do they? And if they do wouldn't it be great to find out how they juggle all of these demands and still have tine to have fun, and feel satisfied and enjoy life. Most all of us just want to feel happy and when the pain of something gets too hard to bear we will find ways to change our behaviours, or environment, we will do whatever it takes to ease that pain. Sometimes it begins with baby steps but every step you take in the direction of happiness is worth its weight in gold. as you find your way to feeling good you will be an example to your family and friends. Try this visualisation technique. it can be a powerful antidote to stress as it creates distance between you and your problems, giving you perspective. Close your eyes and take a moment. Think of a stressful situation and imagine putting everything to do with it into a box. Close the lid. Put the box down on the ground. Now imagine yourself stepping into a lift and travelling up the side of a mountain. When you are at the top imagine you are stepping out of the lift and feeling safe. Have a look around at all you can see from up high in this place. Now take a look at the box. Notice how far away is it? Notice the size of it now. How does it feel to think about the contents of the box from this place? Enjoy your new perspective before returning down the mountain. This gives you a chance to get some space away from your stressful situation. Use your imagination focus on things working out the best possible way instead of using it to imagine what could go wrong! Sounds simple yet it can feel like a step too far as our habits of thinking have long been established. Try it out. Every time you catch a worry, Ask yourself…What if it all worked out ?Imagine the best case scenario. What would need to happen for it all to work out? How would the resolution of the situation feel, look like? try to get the pictures clear and as big and colourful as possible. How would you look ?sound? feel? Embellish the scene as much as you can. These questions help your mind look in a solution orientated direction. It will take practice as our subconscious repeats patterns without us even noticing. You can also ask yourself how will this situation be in a weeks time? a months time? Write down a list off anything and everything you like to do Read this to remind yourself what makes you smile Even reading your list will help increase positive hormones into body and encourage positive feelings. See can you plan to one thing off that list this week or this month and keep adding to it. Remember No matter how hard things get there is always a way to make it feel better? If I can be of further help call me on 0866372746 or email lindaallen940@gmail.com or via lindaallen.ie

Have you found yourself wrung out, tense tired and you haven't even got out the door to work yet? The stresses and strains, the toils and trials of life just keep coming and some days its hard to know whats what. “ It seems the faster I run the more I stand still” a weary client said to me recently “its as if I am on a treadmill that wont switch off, and now its in my mind as well. Thoughts ,plans ,organising and that is only for dinner for the family, a dinner that can hardly taste anymore. “ By the time you handle the long delays in traffic, the ringing phone as emails and calls about work keep your nervous system alert and ready of action, you are flooded with stress hormones.And your mind is like a buzzing fly incessantly going over and over things never giving you a reprieve. Is it always a rush to get to the next thing Does this ring a bell? Have your lost the taste of satisfaction in your day to day life and haven't the energy or interest in going out at the weekend. And yet the people around you in work, out and about seem so efficient, professional and have it all worked out Or do they? And if they do wouldn't it be great to find out how they juggle all of these demands and still have tine to have fun, and feel satisfied and enjoy life. Most all of us just want to feel happy and when the pain of something gets too hard to bear we will find ways to change our behaviours, or environment, we will do whatever it takes to ease that pain. Sometimes it begins with baby steps but every step you take in the direction of happiness is worth its weight in gold. as you find your way to feeling good you will be an example to your family and friends. Try this visualisation technique. it can be a powerful antidote to stress as it creates distance between you and your problems, giving you perspective. Close your eyes and take a moment. Think of a stressful situation and imagine putting everything to do with it into a box. Close the lid. Put the box down on the ground. Now imagine yourself stepping into a lift and travelling up the side of a mountain. When you are at the top imagine you are stepping out of the lift and feeling safe. Have a look around at all you can see from up high in this place. Now take a look at the box. Notice how far away is it? Notice the size of it now. How does it feel to think about the contents of the box from this place? Enjoy your new perspective before returning down the mountain. This gives you a chance to get some space away from your stressful situation. Use your imagination focus on things working out the best possible way instead of using it to imagine what could go wrong! Sounds simple yet it can feel like a step too far as our habits of thinking have long been established. Try it out. Every time you catch a worry, Ask yourself…What if it all worked out ?Imagine the best case scenario. What would need to happen for it all to work out? How would the resolution of the situation feel, look like? try to get the pictures clear and as big and colourful as possible. How would you look ?sound? feel? Embellish the scene as much as you can. These questions help your mind look in a solution orientated direction. It will take practice as our subconscious repeats patterns without us even noticing. You can also ask yourself how will this situation be in a weeks time? a months time? Write down a list off anything and everything you like to do Read this to remind yourself what makes you smile Even reading your list will help increase positive hormones into body and encourage positive feelings. See can you plan to one thing off that list this week or this month and keep adding to it. Remember No matter how hard things get there is always a way to make it feel better? If I can be of further help call me on 0866372746 or email lindaallen940@gmail.com or via lindaallen.

Timeline Photos

There is a picture I once saw in a Winnie the Pooh book where Eeyore (the donkey) is standing under a dark cloud and its raining down on top of him. Winnie the pooh however is standing in the sunshine in the same shot. For everyone, there are times when a dark cloud just seems to be following you around. You may not even even know why. Some days that cloud seems like you just cannot get out from under it. And if this continues for a time it can seem darker and heavier. And you know it doesn't make sense. You like the people around you and you don’t want to have them to suffer on account of your mood.. And so you withdraw. You find getting to social events difficult because you don’t have any energy and because you don’t want to be a downer. Being a downer to people around you would just make things even worse. If this continues you can feel stuck as if on a hamster wheel consisting of.. tired, fed up, dragging yourself to work when you can and through the day with barely enough energy. You end up missing out on many of life simple pleasures like Eeyore you are stuck under that cloud. Sounding familiar? You want things to be different but you just don't have the motivation or energy to do anything. At some point though, often during a particularly low spell, you realise you’re stuck.I meet so many people in my work who struggle with these feelings and isolate themselves even more by withdrawing until there comes a time when they know something needs to change and there is always a way to help yourself so…… Where to start? 1.Reach out. Tell someone you trust that you are just not coping and life feels like a heavy boulder you are carrying around. Make that call if not to a friend, to a professional, a support group or a helpline. It makes such a difference to have someone to listen and really hear you. It can help bring relief and allow a ray of sunshine to break through the cloud. Maybe only a fleeting relief but edging in the right direction. 2.Try and get more specific about What, exactly, is the bad feeling you have? Anger? Stress? Sadness? Loneliness? Neuroscience says that just giving your darkness a name can defuse it. Describing an emotion in just a word or two helps reduce the emotion. 3. Ask “What am I grateful for?” One powerful effect of gratitude is that it can boost serotonin. Trying to think of things you are grateful for forces you to focus on the positive aspects of your life.not always an easy thing to do in a dark mood but just the act of remembering to be thankful is the flexing of a type of emotional intelligence that brings you in the direction of boosting your serotonin and helping you to dissipate that cloud. 4. Grab hold of those moments and build on them adding to the positive changes by getting some fresh air, taking some exercise, meeting a friend for a chat and a laugh. Don't forget the power of laughter it can bring much relief. Once the cloud is being fragmented by light rays in the form of… moments of ease, better feelings and more positive thoughts as these permeate through the darkness you can tip the balance in favour of the better feelings. 5. Smile when you can. Cry when you need to and Reach Out when it all feels too much! If I can be of any help please feel free to contact me at 0866372746 or email lindaallen940@gmail.com

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Author Linda Allen will visit Tallaght Library on Wednesday Jan 18th 2017 @6pm Booking Essential/ free entry talib@sdublincoco.ie Phone: 01 4620073 www.southdublinlibraries.ie An inspiring and uplifting talk by Linda Allen on living with the aftermath of her teenage son’s death by suicide. Her message brings to life the possibility of finding solace and hope in difficult circumstances, turning adversity into positivity and choosing to live fully in the face of tragedy.

Timeline Photos

A few ideas that might help to steady your ship in the whirl of expectations as a New Year begins! In the bombardment of our lives by a presentation of how we should look ,act and behave in order to belong it is ever more important to find ways to connect with ourselves. Does this underlying pressure cause you to feel less than or falling short in some way? Now that you have lived up to the societal pressures and expectations for Christmas or not as they case may be the message is… Don't relax as its time to set up and fulfil your New Years Resolutions. Detox, get fit, and book that holiday and don't forget to be happy. Adverts flood our TV screens demonstrating ways to do this and examples of how it all should look! Does the chaos of our world leave you feeling drained and weary? Do you feel you are on a merry go round...going around in circles finding that the wheel keeps turning and you wouldn’t mind getting off for a rest? Except you just had some time off for Christmas yet feeling relaxed and happy just eludes you. Do you find it hard to sit still as when you do, you find your mind making lists of jobs you could be or feel you should be doing? Does guilt or feeling that you are just not cutting the mustard occupy your mind like some unwelcome visitor who doesn't leave without persuasion? How often do you feel the need to check your phone? Is it hard to resist comparing yourself to the smiling happy pictures and experiences that are presented to you by social media? Everything seems to be moving faster and we seem to need more instant gratification, a sugar hit a spending spree just so we can feel good. All of this pressure can build up and can cause us to feel worn out, not good enough or just wondering what is is all for! Being able to understand and manage our emotions, particularly those strong emotions which can hijack and threaten to overwhelm us, can allow us to feel more in control and respond, rather than react, to difficult situations. Emotional regulation is one of the key factors for the development of resilience and wellbeing and at this time of year there an even greater need to support our well being. You can help yourself to feel better and take charge of your emotions! Believe me this is one I have had to take on board in order to feel good and survive the reality of my sons death. How? When you find yourself spinning off into an anxiety loop, or into a spiral of negative feelings or feelings of unworthiness, sometimes you just need to interrupt the pattern. Inserting a pause gives you a moment to collect and orientate y -You can do this by naming the emotion you are feeling. Identify it. Accept it. This can cause a shift in the biochemistry of your brain. -See the emotion as a flashing light signal thats asking that you pay attention to something. -Take 30 seconds and tune into your own body, you can do this anywhere.You can be sitting, standing, lying down, whatever. Focus your attention on the sensations in your body. Just let yourself notice whatever comes up warmth, coolness, tingling, pressure, tightness.There’s no need to evaluate the sensations as "good" or "bad." Tension is simply tension. There are probably plenty of sensations going on at once or shifting and changing. Just notice. -Then breathe. Take a slow inhale, filling your lungs from bottom to top see if you can inhale into your lower belly and then fill upward into chest. Exhale through your nose. Repeat for a couple of breaths. This will help you take advantage of the connections between breath and mood. By slowing and deepening your breathing, you can actually create feelings of relaxation and calm. -Make a decision Another thing to do that may sound obvious but can help when overwhelm is looming is to make a decision. Even a small decision can help alleviate stressful feelings. Decide to pause as above or decide to go for a walk, or take a break from your phone for a half hour……Decide what feels right for you. Many of life's decisions are really about determining what you value most. When many options seem reasonable, it's helpful and comforting to rely on your values – and use them as a strong guiding force to point you in the right direction. Say yes or no to an invitation or request depending on what feels good for you. Give yourself the gift of putting you first. -Practice gratitude. This simple act of paying attention to that which you are thankful for generates a sense of appreciation. Appreciating ourselves and others helps restore the colour to our black-and-white perception of life. Write down 5 things you are grateful for in a day… the warmth of a fire, the laughter of children, the touch of the cold breeze on your face, the smell of dinner…. Your list can be anything and everything that comes to mind and will serve to support you. Remember No matter how hard things get there is always a way to make it feel better? Choose what works for you and keep practicing. Build up that muscle of self belief and resilience Change takes time and new behaviours need repetition to become automatic responses. Our mind is a complex machine that is always processing and evaluating our world. We just need to start paying attention to what we input into it, where we focus it and how we use it to interpret experiences and events. We can take charge of these things and become the captain of our own ship. If I can be of further help call me on 0866372746 or email lindaallen940@gmail.com

Life Just Better

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How often do we find ourselves worrying about all the things that might not work out, that may go wrong? With the extra pressure that advertising puts on us to have a perfect Christmas we can end up in a an anxious state fearing that…… .....we might get tongue tied or say the wrong thing at a social event …..we wont get it all done in time …..we will fail to meet deadlines as work pressures mount …..we might overcook the turkey …. we might not get the right gifts …..we might not have enough money to survive Christmas …..we might feel like a failure as everyone else seems to have it all worked out …. we might feel so lonely even in a crowd ,,…we are not doing enough to support the myriad of worth causes We are bombarded with imagery of the perfect family, food and way to spend our time and money. What can we do with this to help ourselves? 1.Imagine using your imagination focus on things working out the best possible way instead of using it to imagine what could go wrong! Sounds simple yet it can feel like a step too far as our habits of thinking have long been established. Try it out. Every time you catch a worry Ask yourself…What if it all worked out What would need to happen for it all to work out? How would the resolution of the situation feel, look like? These questions help your mind look in a solution orientated direction. It will take practice as our subconscious repeats patterns without us even noticing. Like getting fit changing our habitual thinking habits takes consistency. 2.You can also ask yourself how will this situation be in a weeks time? a months time? Will these things I am worrying about now matter so much in a months time 3.Try this short exercise Close your eyes and think of a stressful situation.Then imagine putting everything to do with it into a box. Close the lid of the box and place it down on the ground. Now imagine yourself stepping into a lift and travelling up the side of a mountain. When you are at the top imagine you are stepping out of the lift and feeling safe. Have a look around at all you can see from this place.Now take a look at the box. Notice how far away is it? Notice the size of it now. Enjoy your new perspective before returning down the mountain. This gives you a chance to create some space away from your stressful situatio Lastly for now Write down 3 things you are good at or were successful at the end of a day And 3 things you are grateful for These simple tips can really help turn you thinking around and help you become more effective in achieving your goals and having some ease this Christmas. Our mind is a complex machine that is always processing and evaluating our world. We just need to start paying attention to what we input into it. Remember No matter how hard things get there is always a way to make it feel better? If I can be of further help call me on 0866372746 or email lindaallen940@gmail.com

Linda Allen Counsellling &Healing

Linda Allen Counsellling &Healing

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Some refuelling tips for your mind body engine especially needed at this time of Year! How fast can you and for and for how long? How many demands are extra loaded on this at time of year? Does it feel like there are too many tasks for one mind and body? And yet it is relentless. Pressure to live up to and fulfil everyone’s wish list along with the usual daily demands. Your physical, emotional and mental bodies cannot run on fumes alone. What tells you that are in the reserve tank? Do you recognise your warning lights? Is it that you are flustered easily by a simple request that adds to your load? Is it that you had a coffee and find you are looking for another? Are you running to grab a sugar hit as you go through your day? Is sleep proving difficult as your mind plans and mulls over your day? Are you cranky with your loved ones or finding an over -reaction to the ever building traffic jams? Does it feel like your mind is just not working properly as trying to remember a simple place name or where you left your keys eludes you? If any or all of the above sound familiar then the orange light may flashing in your personal fuel tank! Take comfort in the fact that these are all natural response to a stress- filled life and are manageable. So what can you do? Stop and breathe. just pause and notice your breathing for 1 minute. Notice don't judge it or try to change the rhythm Know when you just need a rest. Close your eyes for 5 mins. Look around you and observe three things and name them. This really stops the mind chatter as you notice and name objects. Change your posture. If sitting stand up, if standing move around. just change your physical position.. this is really good to interrupt your mind patterns 5. Make a list of all you have to do. Cross off what you have no control over and prioritise the rest. Plan one small action that will help reduce your list 6. Commit to notice your thoughts a couple of times a day. Are you satisfied with what is on your mind? think of something you would like instead 7. Imagine it all working out in the best possible way. Remember worry is using our imagination to get what we don't want! Our mind is a complex machine that is always processing and evaluating our world. We just need to start paying attention to what we input into it. And don't forget no matter how hard things get there is always a way to make it feel better if you would like to contact me please feel free to mail at lindaallen940@gmail.com or lindaallen.ie

Sinéad Burke interviews Linda Allen, author of ‘See you in two minutes Ma’ for A Lust for Life

https://youtu.be/nyyl8ZTK_3w "No matter how hard things get there is always a way to make it feel better. I am so grateful to "A lust for life "for the opportunity to share my story and deliver my message. It is a fantastic resource and provides access to supports and stories from many people as they navigate the choppy waters of life from anxiety struggles and remedies to parenting to making a difference. I had the privilege of being interviewed by the inspirational Sinead Burke. If my story inspires or can help you or others please feel free to share it and contact me at lindaallen940@gmail.com or visit linda allen.ie

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Feel like its all getting on top of you? Ever have that feeling of dread in the pit of your stomach? Do you find it is worse on a Sunday night? Does stress and anxiety seem to run through most of your day? Is your mind like a buzzing fly incessantly going over and over things never giving you a reprieve. Is it always a rush to get to the next thing? Does the laundry basket ever overflowing cause a feeling of overwhelm as it seems never gets done. Now the good news 1.Know you are not alone. You would be amazed how many people are living life with consistent feelings of stress, shallow breathing, sweaty palms butterflies in their stomachs. 2.know it is possible to change this way of being.You can make your life feel easier Patterns of thoughts that keep us stuck yet they are so automatic we don't even notice until our bodies become tense and our mind overactive. and we feel like we are going around in circles. Awareness gives you back the remote control. Set yourself a reminder on your phone. When to goes off ..Stop notice what you are feeling, notice your thoughts don't judge, just become aware. Now you can ask if you would like to choose to think something different. Change you posture if sitting stand up for a moment and stretch or move. Simple yet really effective. believe me I use these techniques a lot! If you would like to know more feel free to contact me at lindaallen940@gmail.com